How do we live an empowered life? How do we contribute, have meaning, and connection, while expressing our unique passion and wisdom from inner divine essence? How do we manifest potential in all areas of life? These questions represent a core longing for all individual and organizational clients I coach.
Dawna Marova states the intention of living an empowered life beautifully in her poem:
I Will Not Die an Unlived Life
I will not die an unlived life.
I will not live in fear
of falling or catching fire.
I choose to inhabit my days,
to allow my living to open me,
to make me less afraid,
more accessible;
to loosen my heart
until it becomes a wing,
a torch, a promise.
I choose to risk my significance,
to live so that which came to me as seed
goes to the next as blossom,
and that which came to me as blossom,
goes on as fruit.
What I have seen in my life and the lives of my clients is a progression toward empowerment. First we discover our wisdom and voice, then we own and embrace this authority, then we embody empowerment; which always already exists as our core essence, but at times remains covered and hidden.
The way I see it play out is first we recognize our identification as a victim, with all power being “out there” and “done to us.” This external reference must by definition include a perpetrator from which all experience of suffering and happiness comes. This can be at work with our boss or a co-worker making our life miserable, or someone in our family or even our own inner critic.
Through transformational growth and development, we shift our identification to that of a survivor. Wounded healer, internally referenced, yet it is still in relationship to our previous condition of being a victim. If we stop here, we can feel a need to fight for justice on behalf those abused and identify ourselves being for or against something or someone. We rise above, but there is still a reference to that which needs to be transcended.
As we become empowered, we no longer identify ourselves relative to the other. We just are; living from our genuine nature. This expression of essence through each of us is varied and unique; a poet, a mom, a cellist, a healer, a leader, or no particular expression in any given moment; just radiant presence. Yes, the road to this freedom generally contains discomfort as we relinquish the drama and trauma we once thought defined us, but the reward is worth the effort!
Another model of this continuous development and transformation is up the ladder towards empowerment and mastery:
Addiction<Habit<Influence<Choice>Mastery
There are so many great tools in transformational coaching to assist us in fully uncovering our power and embracing our mastery:
• Mindfulness practice: learning the quiet, still, peace filled condition of our Body-Mind
• Utilizing our witness consciousness
• Recognizing limiting beliefs and self talk
• Creating a “new story” of power, responsibility and choice in our moment to moment decisions; allowing the old story of “being unlovable, unworthy and self loathing” to dissipate
• Recognizing milestones as they occur and celebrate our capacity to Live From Our Center Within for longer periods of time.
Here is another version of our transformational journey (which is universal to every human being) put eloquently by Portis Nelson.
Autobiography in 5 Short Chapters
Chapter one
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I am lost…I am helpless.
It isn’t my fault.
It takes forever to find a way out.
(We are calling this addiction)
Chapter Two
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in again.
I can’t believe I am in the same place,
But it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.
(We are calling this habit)
Chapter Three
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it there.
I still fall………..it’s a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.
(We are calling this influence)
Chapter Four
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.
(We are calling this choice)
Chapter Five
I walk down another street.
(We are calling this mastery)
For me during my empowered moments, I feel free, and live in a world that is no-where and now-here. There is real choice; I have the ability to respond instead of react. I live and heal and teach and love as my own crazy unique Divine expression. I continue to practice, learn and trust my empowerment and mastery in the world. I invite you to do the same.
Building A New Paradigm
The transformational shift occurring on the planet is accelerating. Do you see it? Feel it? Know it? I have noticed there are new structures emerging. As old unsustainable paradigms are falling away, new components are taking priority.
For instance, have you noticed how transparent the world has become? Behaviors that had previously been covered up, obscured or even acceptable are now on display for the world to see. Viral on the internet are acts of aggression towards people in public and private spaces, infidelity in relationships, illegal business practices, institutional corruption, and environmental dumping.
The old paradigm of protecting and developing our own interests often at the expense of others, scarcity mentality, division and separation, and power over another are all becoming exposed and unacceptable. Replacing that view point is one of transparency, collaboration, honoring diversity, holism, mutual accountability, integrity, authenticity and interconnection. Transformation can be terrifying and exhilarating as we navigate our personal life, relationships, organizations, families, communities, and global community as new rules are being created moment to moment.
Is your focus on what is disintegrating or what is emerging?
There is a story describing the power of our intention and attention.
“The Wolves Within”
An old Grandfather said to his grandson, who came to him with anger at a friend who had done him an injustice, let me tell you a story.
I too, at times, have felt a great hate for those that have taken so much, with no sorrow for what they do. But hate wears you down, and does not hurt your enemy. It is like taking poison and wishing your enemy would die. I have struggled with these feelings many times. He continued, it is as if there are two wolves inside me. One is good and does no harm. He lives in harmony with all around him, and does not take offense when no offense was intended. He will only fight when it is right to do so, and in the right way.
But the other wolf, ah! He is full of anger. The littlest thing will set him into a fit of temper. He fights everyone, all the time, for no reason. He cannot think because his anger and hate are so great. It is helpless anger, for his anger will change nothing.
Sometimes, it is hard to live with these two wolves inside me, for both of them try to dominate my spirit. The boy looked intently into his Grandfather’s eyes and asked, which one wins, Grandfather? The Grandfather smiled and quietly said, the one I feed.
As we experience the acceleration of this shift in the world, we remind each other to share our gifts, talents, strengths, vision and creativity to contribute and build the new paradigm and world view. Does your vision contribute to evolving consciousness on the planet in such areas as health care, business, education, public policy, environment, government, human services, nutrition, global citizenship, laws, artistic expression, communication, financial markets, or fitness? Make time and space to connect with your inner passion and invite your unique expression into the world.
If you live in the twin cities and are interested in meeting to support each other in bringing your creative work into the world, consider joining us every other Tuesday from January to March for Manifesting Your Vision class.